Intimacy
by awomanontheverge
Summary: Regina craves intimacy.


Regina craved intimacy, the kind that makes your whole body flush and turns your insides to mush. She had never experienced it before. With Daniel, she had come close, but their love was cursed from the beginning. Since then, however, she never opened herself up to experience that true passion, that vulnerability. Regina had come to realize that intimacy in itself was a curse – inevitably, it would make her lose her guard and it would open her up to the intolerable pain of solidarity. Letting someone in opened up the possibility of having to let them go.

So when Emma Swan tried to caress her that night, running her fingertips deliciously down the small of her back and down the curve of her behind, Regina quickly swatted her away. Sex she could handle ; intimacy, she could not.

The two sat in silence for a moment, lying in Regina's queen size bed while they shyly played with each other's fingertips. The tension in the air was thick and it made the brunette's heart race.

"I'm trying really hard, ya know," Emma said, breaking the silence.

"To what?" Regina asked, letting go of the blonde's hand. She sat up against the head of the bed and sprawled her legs out in a stretch.

"To understand you." Emma reached out and placed her warm palm on Regina's thigh. She rubbed her thumb lovingly back and forth on the smooth skin, caressing.

Regina shifted uncomfortably and pulled her legs up into her chest.

Emma sighed, frustrated. "Will you talk to me?"

Silence.

"I don't even know if we're on the same page here," Emma huffed, laying on her back and staring at the ceiling. "You won't talk to me about what you're thinking or feeling. We get to a point where I think, hey, she's happy, this" – Emma gestured between them – "could work, and them BAM, you pull away and we take 20 steps back."

Silence.

"Hello?"

More silence.

"Fine."

The older woman was looking down, picking nervously at her crimson painted toenails. She said nothing but watched out of the corner of her eye as Emma grunted angrily before moving off the bed to grab her coat. The blonde shoved her tennis shoes on and, not even taking time to tie the laces, stomped toward the door.

"I'm scared," Regina said softly. It was barely audible, less than a whisper.

Emma turned, letting go of the door handle. "Of what?" she asked.

"Of you." Regina turned her head, looking into the emerald eyes that took her breath away. "Of this." She gestured between the two of them. "This feels real now but, when you leave…"

"When I leave?" Emma furrowed her brow. "Regina, I'm not going anywhe-"

"When you leave," Regina continued, gesturing to the fact that Emma was already on her way out the door, "that feeling of real love turns to real pain. And that pain" – Regina rubbed her wrists as they twitched at the thought - "That pain…" Her voice trailed off and her eyes went out of focus, gazing blurrily out the window.

_Love is weakness, Regina. It feels real now, at the start it always does, but it's an illusion; it fades and then you're left with nothing. _

_**Nothing**_. Regina cringed at the word. The possibility of Emma Swan leaving her was terrifying. She began to tremble.

Emma moved back to her side of the bed. She sat up and wrapped one arm around Regina's body. The brunette hesitated a moment before relaxing into the younger woman's touch. Emma could feel shaking beneath her and it terrified her. What had hurt Regina so bad that even a harmless embrace reduced her to shakes? "I will only leave if you ask me to," the blonde explained. "And even then" – Emma tugged beneath Regina's chin gently so their eyes met – "I don't think I could."

Regina was drowning. The emotions tingling within her were too much, too fast, too soon. She clung to Emma helplessly and tears spilled. She opened her mouth to speak, trying to muster the power and the courage to tell Emma Swan to leave her bed and never return, but her voice betrayed her as a small request burst out; "Kiss me," she whispered.

And Emma Swan kissed her like she had never been kissed before. The blonde cupped the older woman's face gently in her hands and she pulled their lips harder together. Regina's resolve was slipping and she gladly fell, relaxing into a kiss that sent butterflies dancing in her stomach. Their lips parted only to take a much needed breath. The brunette reached out and she tentatively brushed her index finger over Emma's bottom lip, exploring. Her fingertips ghosted over the younger woman's neck and she couldn't help but smile as she watched Emma's eyes flutter before shutting completely. Regina pulled back and tugged at the hem of her nightgown, pulling it over her head in one quick motion. She bit her lower lip and waited for Emma to open her eyes again. The older woman's heart thumped in her chest. Why was she so nervous? She had stripped before, laid naked with past lovers. Yet this moment, this _intimate_ moment, between Emma and her was causing a whole new range of emotions that she couldn't completely wrap her head around. She held her breath until Emma opened her eyes; the wide grin that spread across the Sheriff's face calmed her nerves- _for now_- and she exhaled.

Emma's eyes flickered with want as she studied the Mayor's almost naked form, clad only in a pair of baby blue silk panties. She moved her gaze from Regina's plumps lips down to her perfectly round breasts. Her nipples seemed to harden under the blonde's gaze and she couldn't help but grin at the effect she was having on the normally stoic woman. She looked up at the brunette's face and noticed a deep red blush creeping up over her cheeks. Emma giggled. "Madame Mayor," she teased, "it appears you're blushing."

"Oh shut up," Regina purred, pulling Emma close to her by the collar of her shirt. She crashed their lips back together and alternated between biting gently on the bottom of Emma's lip and soothing the burn with her warm tongue. The older woman moved her hands down and slowly unbuttoned the blouse preventing their skin from touching. Normally, the two didn't completely strip – it was usually just a pair of jeans around Emma's ankles or a skirt bunched up over Regina's ass followed by a shifting aside of one another's panties; it was always a quick fuck with a few sloppy kisses and gropes until Regina would come and push Emma away.

She pulled the blouse down the blonde's arms and back and threw it aside where it landed in a pile on top of Regina's discarded nightgown. The older woman spread open her hands and ran them up the length of Emma's toned stomach, touching, feeling, taking in as much of her bedmate as she could.

A soft, contented moan escaped Emma's lips at the feel of Regina's fingertips on her. The familiar throb of arousal could be felt between her thighs as the older woman unzipped her jeans and threw them down onto the carpet. She could feel Regina's fingertips playing with the band of her panties and Emma shivered, moving her own hands so they were on top of the brunette's. "There's no rush," Emma whispered before moving Regina's hands to the side of her body.

Regina, embarrassed, rested her hands on Emma's shoulders and gazed into the blonde's eyes. She was so used to the quick '_let's get this over with_' routine of her sex life that she had no idea how to really be caring and intimate with another person. She drew little circles on Emma's skin nervously.

Emma gently pushed Regina flat on her back and smiled. She brushed her lips feather softly against the brunette's neck and grinned at the breathy response that came from beneath her. The younger woman tucked her mouth below Regina's ear and kissed the sensitive skin there; her breath was hot against the Mayor's skin. "

"Mmm," the brunette moaned softly. Her thighs twitched in anticipation as a pool of sticky warmth coated them. Emma wasn't even touching her and it was already driving her wild.

The blonde worked her way down Regina's chest with a trail of hot, opened mouthed kisses. Emma gazed at the older woman as she reached out a hand and delicately ran her fingernail in circles over the sensitive skin around Regina's nipples. The brunette's eyes fluttered shut and her mouth dangled open in a silent moan. Her past lovers had palmed her breasts roughly, squeezing, biting, but she had never felt the soft, sensual touch that Emma Swan was teasing her so wonderfully with. And when the blonde darted her tongue out and swirled it in circles around Regina's right nipple, she thought she was going to come from that feeling alone.

Emma moved to the brunette's left breast and gave it a similar treatment. She could feel prickly goosebumps rising on Regina's skin and she couldn't help but smile at the thought that she was the one causing them. In the past, Regina rarely made a sound during sex. Emma would grind against her ass as she took her from behind and fucked her with two fingers, fast, hard, until a soft whimper would escape the Mayor's lips. Without that whimper, Emma wouldn't have had any idea Regina was even enjoying their trysts. But tonight was different. Each touch, each kiss, each caress elicited deep breathy moans from the brunette and, simply put, they were driving Emma wild. She sat up and studied the woman beneath her, naked, vulnerable and trusting. The blonde moved slightly to the side of Regina and reached out, brushing the pads of her fingers down the brunette's stomach. A smile crept up on her face as she felt the muscles in Regina's abdomen flex and relax. Emma continued her gentle strokes downward, running her fingertip back and forth over the inside of her lover's thighs. She moved slightly and tucked her lips beneath Regina's ear once again. "Where do you want me?" Emma asked.

Regina clenched her thighs shut tight, trying to put a little pressure on the sweet spot that was throbbing between her legs. The sultry tone of Emma's voice drove her crazy. "Everywhere," the older woman moaned, her voice deep. She was sure she had never been so turned on in her life.

Emma grinned and gently brushed back and forth over Regina's thighs with her fingertips. She studied her lover's face intently, watching for any sign of hesitation. The blonde gently pushed the other woman's blue panties down her legs and over her ankles. Emma ducked down and peppered kisses over the trail that her fingers had taken only moments before. The feel of Emma's lips between her thighs caused Regina's vision to darken. She could feel Emma's warm breath on her; the pleasure was overwhelming. "Oh," she moaned, hovering her hands over the expansive amount of blonde curls. Regina hesitantly tangled her fingers in Emma's hair and pulled. Her hips bucked on their own accord as Emma's hot tongue ran over her clit, gently at first but a little harder as Regina pushed down on the girl's head. Her heart was pounding in her chest, a mixture of nerves and fear. The intimacy she so craved was fast upon her and her face scrunched up in terror. She began to tremble, afraid to relax and enjoy the moment. Regina tensed, letting go of the grip she had on Emma's hair.

Emma stopped, sensing a struggle and feeling Regina's body tremble beneath her touch. "Are you ok?" she asked, looking up at her with innocent and loving eyes. The blonde sat up on her elbows and gazed at the other woman lovingly. Taking one of Regina's hands in hers, she kissed her palm softly and smiled. "We can stop. Whatever you want is ok."

_You don't know what you want. But I do._

Her mother's words burned in Regina's ears. For years she had been letting her control what she did, how she felt. The abandonment issues that plagued every one of the brunette's past relationships were all because of her mother's incessant assurance that _she_ knew what was best; that power was better than love; and in that moment, staring deep into the emerald voids that were Emma Swan's eyes, she cast her mother's words aside, taking control. Regina pulled the younger woman in for a tender kiss and smiled as their lips pressed together. "This," she whispered against Emma's mouth. "_This_ is what I want."

The blonde smiled and began to move back to her position between Regina's legs, but was stopped by a gentle tugging at her forearm. "Stay here with me?" the brunette asked, tilting her head to the right. Emma nodded and kissed the other woman's lower lip as she snaked her hand down her stomach and over her thighs, teasing. She stroked the soft skin and raised an eyebrow, questioningly. Regina chuckled and nodded, spreading her legs a bit to urge Emma on.

In one swift movement, Emma pushed two fingers into Regina. The delicious moan that escaped the brunette's lips made Emma's center throb. She took the Mayor's lower lip between her teeth and pulled seductively before curling her fingers in a "come hither" motion.

Regina's eyes rolled in the back of her head at the feeling of Emma pushing against her sweet spot. "Oh my god," she whispered, trying to fight the urge to claw down the younger woman's back. Regina reached down between the two of them and rubbed her own clit furiously in small circles as Emma continued to curl her fingers inside her. She was close, so deliciously close.

Emma leaned close and whispered one word, one hot, husky, dark word that sent Regina Mills past her breaking point: "Come." A mixture of demand and request, the brunette came undone on the blonde's hand, wrapping her arms around her and clinging desperately as she fell.

"It's ok, I've got you," the blonde assured, drawing out Regina's orgasm with a few more thrusts. The usually calm and composed Mayor was shaking beneath her, letting out breath after shuddering breath. Emma rolled over and tugged Regina into a loving and protective embrace.

Regina smiled contentedly, closing her eyes; and when Emma Swan tried to caress her that night, running her fingertips deliciously down the small of her back and down the curve of her behind, she relaxed into the touch and reveled in the perfectly intimate moment between them.


End file.
